I am a little girl with little thoughts and if you'll haunt me,my mama is here!

I am wholly a mad girl.Like sometimes,i feel that some one is going from my life and i am helpless to stop him.And one day,if he will come out of my thought then i'll ask him that....And,a monster who runs behind  me in my nightmares.And now cows with their horns!.Not for one time but for so many times,i've seen them.And when i was on the way and i saw so many cows i started crying and abu, intentionally,stopped vehicle there.I was about to faint.A little coward resides in me.A little hypocrite,i am.A little good,i am!...A girl who is on her ways.Seeking A.B.C of life.I can't feel future.I can't have that Khuloos in my namaz.And i just can't be that mature whose words are so polished.But still,i am the part of this world.A cog in this big machine.Not rusted but a little bit worn-out.A creature who might be on an honorable status that she won't need anybody's favor in any work.An independent girl.Free from all worries,Free from all thoughts!Free from all those cows who intercept and those who stings,when i think.

I am like that little girl who is swinging in her cradle and watching all those faces who are so mature than her.Who know how to tackle the problems and she is just a baby to whom they coax and she stays with a big smile.She gets satisfy with their only one pulling of cheeks.Life is making me to swing along the sky and i am swinging.It is making me a silent girl but i am trying to smile.A smile that would be so pure!so truly mine!...

College life is so strange and stranger thing is this that i thought it after spending four years in it.Lol.Ok,so many girls with so many thoughts.Some laughing,some crying some silent and i,gazing at a thing for nothing.So many psyche at one place.And when they come out what happen?those who were used to of silence become naughty because they're taught to become happier and those who were used to of laughing become sober because they're taught to be a serious person.Alternation of personalities and here is your degree.!!because you've learnt how to be a fool!:p..

My habits are getting weird by everyday.Like,in night i create a spiritual atmosphere at home where i tune sufi music and it moves them both to sit quietly and get involved in those kalams.Imagine,a dark house(light nai hoti:p),with a few people in it,absorbing sufism..Awsome!I feel so close to Him.A silence and in this silence a soft melody in your ears.It heals my ear's wounds.They're better from those 'a kr mujhse lipat le'...rofl!...

So,days are going on and i am the same,a little girl,swinging and watching the world.And,if some one scares me then i just say:what?!mama!!!