Childhood,Memories and choti si asha....

Today,i didn't go to college because little sister was ill.But that's not the strong reason she gets ill in other days as well but i never took leave from college.This time,i felt sentiments for her.She is not well!how will she manage?and other thoughts like these made me not to go to college.

Computer,at last,is repaired and i opened the system.How serenity i felt there!It was like some one pushed me back to my childhood.All the photos,that were captured in a very strange ways,reminded me of giggles,laughter and smiles of three of us.2010,2011,2012,2013!!!Antiques.I love antiques.!A photo in which we were laughing.Not we but only two faces,i was made to smile forcefully.A picture in which my little sister has acted as if we're fighting.My elder sister,in one picture,was hugging me.And i recalled that in this picture my mood was off because of something and i told her not to take any photo of mine but still she hugged me and made a photo.But don't think that she hugged me because she had some sympathy with me but she did so because she wanted to see if she looked pretty while hugging or not.How sweet!!..Yeah,we three are like this.

Mein kaisi lg ryi hu?

Mein thik nahi lg ryi?

Tum bohat achi lg ryi hu!

Tum b!!!

Our family called us three barbies and when they used to say so,we used to blush and then we used to do junu munu,aww!chocho!lalalala...You won't understand this language:p.They two are,indeed,barbies.I,oh,i am not a barbie.I am just a girl who has the company of two gems.I remember those winter nights when we three used to talk till late at nights and what we talked,it irritated mama.'tum asay mt chlna'tum yeh colour mt lena'.I used to get annoyed and they reject me saying'tum to ho hi sariyal!'.Not that sariyal,after all,i was one of them.Days ago,i received a text from my elder sister:

What's up bubbles and buttercup!

It made me to smile.I am somewhat a shy girl.Not that shy,like i used to be a hardcore once.

yo!this is how i used to be!full of attitude!B-)

I used to fight with my class fellows.I used to beat the boys if they,mistakenly,irritated me.The head girl of class.The girl to whom no one can challenge.I,once,pulled the hair of a boy because he had called me 'kharus',and once i dragged a boy by his collar because he had made fun of my bag.Well,i was not kind even to girls.The last fight which i fought was with a girl.The very last,after that,i was totally changed.I, violently,twisted her shoulders,i showed no mercy and slapped her till her cheeks got red and then i punched her.A very bold girl, i used to be!.Then,my teacher complained and i faced my mama's wrath.I started crying that fault was hers.But she didn't listen me.Even now,if i find that girl then i'll punch her again.Bloody bitch!.When i was crying my two sisters came and i told my elder sister that how that girl was at fault.I was crying and she started singing:

hans de,hans de tu zra,nahi to bs thora muskra!

She is my darling sister.After that,i decided not to fight with anyone.I closed my cruel face and started living as if i am so innocent,so easy to be to a fool!and so choochi!.Four years have been past and i am a girl with shy attitude.A girl who has changed her yo!style.But i evoke this style of mine in my solitude.When i feel depress.That dance on angreji-beat,is prof.If mama had not stopped me then i would have been a disastrous girl.I feel my self like a prism,on which when light falls it gets divided in seven colors.Depends on what the situation is.After all,actors we're all of this world's stage.

I've a cruel element in me.Not for others as i've controlled myself from doing so.In morning,i was thinking that how peaceful my mind is.And then i thought to play a trick with my brain.A devil thought came in and i started singing those verse which i know might pull me back to that horror episode.I kept on singing loudly:

sardi ki rato mein hum soye ge ik chadar mein!

My brain was like no!no!stop!,but the devil in me continued.A point came when i said to myself'wanna more?!Then i changed rhythm and sang:

saans mein teri saans milli to mujhy sans ayi!

Then i felt a pain.A pain that strangled my throat.My heart began to sink.I was about to cry.I got scared.I realized i shouldn't have done this.Poor me!...I said sorry to my own self.

Ok,i shouldn't talk all about myself.I was talking about my sisters.So,a week ago,my sister came to home and when i saw her i felt so calm.We hugged and a point came when we started jumping while hugging.You may expect such kiddy things from us.We hugged for a long long time and mama was like'bs kr do!'..A friend of mine is so eager to know about herself.Like,i daily receive texts from her that'what suits me best?what title you'll give me?'what i am for you?'and blah blah!.I did reply for sometimes but she kept on irritating me.When my little sister checked those messages,she was like:

Yeh smjhti kiya hai khud ko?Ujde dill ka haal ya ghalib ka khyaal?!

Kiya?!!

*giggles*

Next month,my cousin is going to get married and we all three would enjoy at our best.Some thoughts which overwhelmed me for days and nights might go away.I am feeling so good after sharing my childhood memories and the style of my sisters.How cute i used to be!How bold and brave!Time has changed that choti si ahsa.But what lives forever are memories.I've my memories and one day,these days will also become memories and i'll find myself more better.

So,here i am!the ordinary sister of two barbies.And an ordinary creature of this big world.Neither giggles nor laughs,a calm face with stormy thoughts.